naoki232 2012-3-3 12:52
屎差點當眾噴出
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">第一次要去中壢好好見識一下女生說的便宜天堂</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">雖然天氣不是挺晴朗</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">但大小雙寶很愛裝勇</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">短衣短褲輕裝上陣</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">到火車站</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">恩</font><font face="Times New Roman ">..</font><font face="新細明體 ">怪怪</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">肚子怎麼會陣痛</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">絞痛</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">一陣一陣</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">也不去想太多</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">快上車吧</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">坐到一半</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">天阿</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">我意識到這種絞痛</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">是烙賽的前兆</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!!!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">但想說應該到了再拉也不遲</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">我錯了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">我錯了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">我錯了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">我錯了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">....</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">才到桃園站</font><font face="Times New Roman ">(</font><font face="新細明體 ">還要經過內壢才會到中壢</font><font face="Times New Roman ">)</font><font face="新細明體 ">我的括約肌告訴我裡面的大軍要衝出來了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">我緊緊握著小寶的手</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">就像個孕婦一樣緊緊握住唯一的依靠</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">深呼吸</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">放輕鬆</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">心想這下子要是噴出屎來我的人生就毀了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">但那種傾穴而出的感覺越來越明顯</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">我快哭了</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">到內壢</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">屎幾乎堵到洞口了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">滿滿的一整</font><font face="Times New Roman ">"</font><font face="新細明體 ">肛</font><font face="Times New Roman ">"</font><font face="新細明體 ">阿</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!</font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">我把十幾年來練國術的毅力都用上了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">括約肌緊緊的把關</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">硬是把賽扣在洞口裡</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="Times New Roman ">"</font><font face="新細明體 ">中壢站到了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">中壢站到了</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">要下車的旅客請不要忘記攜帶您的屎</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">祝您旅途平安</font><font face="Times New Roman ">"</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">啊</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!!</font><font face="新細明體 ">終於到了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">痾</font><font face="Times New Roman ">....</font><font face="新細明體 ">不過</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">問題來了</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">我是真的真的忍不住的狀態</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">肚子超痛屎又已經來到洞口</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">我連走路都很困難</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">小寶在旁邊扶持我</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">支持我</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">看我這麼痛苦又髒話狂飆</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">她都覺得無奈呀</font><font face="Times New Roman ">....</font><font face="新細明體 ">我連票在自己口袋都找不到</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">一心只想出口左轉去廁所</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">於是乎小寶把她的票給我</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">她自己再去補那張可以不用補的票</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...(</font><font face="新細明體 ">衷心感謝</font><font face="Times New Roman ">)</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">天阿</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">出了站馬上看左邊九點鐘方向</font><font face="Times New Roman ">..</font><font face="新細明體 ">是的</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">廁所大剌剌的座落在底邊</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">不行了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">括約肌快失守了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!</font><font face="新細明體 ">洞口已經感覺到濕滑了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">難道就這樣了嗎</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">一生英明就要毀於旦夕嗎</font><font face="Times New Roman ">?</font><font face="新細明體 ">不</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">不行</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">我用盡全身僅存的力氣</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">硬生生讓括約肌瞬間無雙狀態</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">但也只能撐個三十秒</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">步履闌珊的到了男廁</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">彷彿唐僧到了天竺取得了佛經一般</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">開心的握住門把</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">恩</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">有人</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">再換下一間</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">幹</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">有人</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">靠腰阿屎都要噴出來了啦</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">馬上換下一間</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">上天耍我嗎</font><font face="Times New Roman ">?</font><font face="新細明體 ">有人</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!! </font><font face="新細明體 ">下一間</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!</font><font face="新細明體 ">我乾脆拉在小便斗好了啊</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">有人</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">有人有人</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">眼看無雙狀態要消失了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">剩下殘障廁所</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...(</font><font face="新細明體 ">沒有門只有類似門簾的遮蔽物</font><font face="Times New Roman ">)</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">不管了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">總比拉在褲子上好</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">走過去打開</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">還有那個人是在尿尿而已</font><font face="Times New Roman ">(</font><font face="新細明體 ">是正常人</font><font face="Times New Roman ">)</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">尿完抖了快十下</font><font face="Times New Roman ">..</font><font face="新細明體 ">年紀輕輕就</font><font face="Times New Roman ">....</font><font face="新細明體 ">真是的ˋˊ</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">等他出去我用最快的速度拉上門簾等不及要解脫了要解脫了唷</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">媽的皮帶在這時候總是最難解</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">索性用蠻力直接拉下去了啦</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">屁股都還沒坐穩</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">屎萬大軍已經傾洩而出</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!</font><font face="新細明體 ">劈哩啪啦的</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!</font><font face="新細明體 ">再慢個一兩秒恐怕已經拉在褲子上</font><font face="Times New Roman ">\</font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">天阿</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">好爽</font><font face="Times New Roman "> </font><font face="新細明體 ">只能用好爽來詮釋當下的感受而已</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">拉完後通體舒暢</font><font face="Times New Roman ">!!!</font><font face="新細明體 ">中壢送我的見面禮也太大了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">.....</font></font><br />
<font face="Times New Roman "><font size="3"> </font></font><br />
<font size="3"><font face="新細明體 ">我還以為這輩子在也不能到中壢來了</font><font face="Times New Roman ">...</font><font face="新細明體 ">呼</font><font face="Times New Roman ">..........</font></font>